TheGoodEarth wrote:Millymollymandy wrote:(having been on the receiving end I really don't see what the big deal is)
MMM, my wife was smacked on the backside but her brother was smacked in the face - no big deal?
What I call smacking is the usual smack on the bum, hand, or perhaps back of leg or arm. It doesn't really hurt, just stings a bit sometimes! I don't call that hitting or violence. I certainly don't condone hitting children in the face (that's hitting not smacking) or getting the strap out! So perhaps there is a difference in English language usage here. I never even got 'spanked' which implies repeated smacking on the bum! I grew up in a house full of love and respect and manners and my family are close and we all love each other, we have never ever fallen out like other families often do. I have the utmost respect for my mum who brought us up singlehandledly after we moved to England, who felt that she had to be much stricter with us as she didn't have my dad around to pass punishments on to, so it was tough on her. Punishment was often not smacking but other things as well, which were miles worse as I got older. I'd much rather have had a smack than have been forbidden to go out to some 'do' with my friends!!
However my original point is that I am neither traumatised by the 'violence' I received at the hands of my mum (and back in the early days probably my dad) nor have I turned into a violent adult. I don't condone violence towards either people, animals OR property. I am totally law abiding and help old ladies cross streets.
I am not commenting on the main issue of this thread because I dont have any advice on how to bring up children. Mostly I was commenting on your earlier comment to point out that I have not become a violent adult because I was smacked as a child. Perhaps the serial killer comment was a bit glib and for that I apologise.