How would you like your funeral to be?

[Shirley]

Is not being sent to the moon quite fancy I would like my ashes to be scattered on my compost heap.

either that or being put on a wooden boat and set fire to viking style.

Up Helly Aa !!!! http://www.shetlandtourism.com/pages/uh ... vening.htm

[Muddypause]

I don't really get this thread. How would I like my funeral to be? I'm the one whose gonna be dead - it won't make a flying fig of difference to me.

Funerals are for the living.

[Stonehead]

Something memorable has to happen - that's about it.

Take one of my great-grandfathers, for example. His funeral in a small, rural cemetery in outback NSW is still talked about. On the day of the funeral, it rained for the first time in years, the horse-drawn hearse couldn't get through the mud nor could the dray they transferred the coffin on to.

In the end, assorted pallbeares carried the coffin several miles to the cemetery. The only problem then was that the cemetery is on the top of a small hill, and that was slippery with mud.

They did manage to get him up there in the end and buried, but it took some doing - not helped by the fact that he was almost seven feet tall.

As I said, memorable!

One I remember myself - and naming no names except that it was not family - was the one where the dead bloke's wife met his mistress for the first time. There was a bit of argy bargy at the cemetery, followed by a right royal p***-up at the local pub, followed by the two women being caught copping off together in the funeral limousine.

You can't organise something like that, so I'll just have to get buried with my fingers crossed...

[bazil]

i dont like traditional funerals...theyre way too somber and i end up crying

i rmember hearing a friend had died and my whole world went numb

i think i want something like valkiries to come down on wing-ed horses to raise me up to val-hallah....and for the vicar to say "burn the empty coffin before they ask questions "

or something a bit mythical

[den_the_cat]

traditional funerals don't have to be sombre, at my Grandads, because he was a gardener all his life, we played "English country garden" as the coffin came in, but we didn't tell anyone we were doing it so there was a moment of silence and then everyone started to laugh as the coffin came into the church. It made things so much nicer, he would have appreciated that.

We also had a relative die of meningitus (she was six) which was potentially an awful funeral, but we were all told to wear pink, and we sang "If you're happy and you know it clap your hands", it was impossible not to smile, even if it was a bit tearful, because some of her classmates were there singing at the top of their voices in that over enthusiastic way they do.....

I have to admit Mums party after her funeral was interesting - all three of my uncles ex wives and my cousins came - which was especially confusing for his present wife who was unaware of the first one or the three kids from that marriage. Disaster was averted when my niece fell over and knocked two teeth out successfully diverting attention, at least temporarily, in the middle of some tricky questioning but I know mum would have been enjoying it to the full so I count it as a good send off.

[2steps]

us north lincs folk should stick together, my wife was in Grimsby today not far from scunthorpe.

cool. never been to scunthorpe, know it's not that far though

[Andy Hamilton]

I don't really get this thread. How would I like my funeral to be? I'm the one whose gonna be dead - it won't make a flying fig of difference to me.

Funerals are for the living.

fair point. Although the sentiment behind the thread was more out of making what could be a morose and rather environmentally wasteful occasion less so.

Thanks for the words of condolences people much apprechiated.

[chadspad]

My Dad wants that song 'wish me luck as you wave me goodbye' lol - think that could raise a smile or two!

Shirlz that poem is beautiful, thanks for sharing!

I wouldnt mind be buried on my land somewhere in a cardboard box - is that allowed? I do believe we can still communicate with loved ones when we die, so hubby and I have agreed to have a large photo of each other to talk at rather than just talking to thin air. Also agree with it all being a colourful affair with lots of laughter and rememberance but I also want people to miss me dreadfully

[ina]

I personally can't imagine being buried - there won't be anybody left after me to go and tend the grave, so what would I have one for anyway? But burial is supposed to be more environment friendly than cremation (can't remember where I read that), so being buried in a forest in a cardboard box without any marker for the grave would be fine with me.

A German poet from the 19th century (Theodor Fontane) wrote one of my favourite poems, about an old squire, who was very generous and loved children. Every autumn he used to give all the kids in the area pears from his wonderful pear tree. When he felt he was dying, he asked his relatives to bury him with a pear in the grave (fortunately he died in autumn!). And lo and behold, years later a pear tree grew from the grave, and was giving away the fruit to the kids again... The squire had known that his son would be too mean to continue his custom.

It's a lovely poem, and there is some true history behind it (the family of that name, Ribbeck, does exist, and there is a pear tree). There's a passable translation of it on the net:

http://www.vonribbeck.de/html/ribbeck_i ... l#englisch

So, please, could you bury me with a pear in my pocket? Or maybe better an apple, pears don't do so well in Scotland...

[Shirley]

My Dad wants that song 'wish me luck as you wave me goodbye' lol - think that could raise a smile or two!

Shirlz that poem is beautiful, thanks for sharing!

That's the song I want played at mine too - Vera Lynne!!

[Shirley]

Ina..

that pear poem is lovely!!! If you go before me I'll make sure you've got an apple in your pocket mate..

Actually I'll probably make sure that there are some plum stones, cherry stones and some pear seeds too just for good measure!! After all, you've been generous all your life

[den_the_cat]

actually what a lovely idea - running a managed woodland and orchard so that people who don't want flowers could request donations to it and trees would be planted to produce wood and fruit which would be given to the community. If I had some land and the energy to work out a business plan.....

[Wombat]

Sorry to hear about your Gran Andy and Dave, very important they are, I never knew mine.

No funeral for me - when the inevitable is getting close, it's time to drive over a cliff in (somebody elses) black porche.........playing patchelbels Canon on the CD player. (Come on! it's a porche.....it's GOT to have a CD player!)

Nev

[Pilsbury]

My friend passed in may this year from a brain tumor so he know it was comng and to save a lot of pain for his wife who was looking after their 3 yo and 5 month old twins he basically planned his own funeral with the songs he wanted and some little suprises.
His wife is a good singer so she recorded the songs he wanted and he listened to the CD before he died but the "best"bit was as the coffin was carried into the church he had the MGM fanfare played at top volume, scared the crap out of a load of people and after that they couldn't help but have a little giggle.

[Millymollymandy]

I've avoided looking at this thread as my stepfather is dying of cancer and I'm just waiting for the phone call to tell me so I can get the first boat or plane over to look after my Mum. It will be very soon, like today or tomorrow.

I've never even been to a funeral before and haven't really had anything to do with death (except for my cat who was put to sleep recently and I got to see her dead body and bury it) so I'm not really looking forward to it. It takes me half an hour to compose a couple of stilted sentences on a condolence card so I've got absolutely no idea what you are supposed to say to people when they have lost a loved one.

Anyway when I disappear off the site for a few weeks you'll know where I am.