Crazy things you were told by your parents

[red]

guess I might qualify as crazy parent as i told my son that toad in the hole was made with toads

actually I'm kind of proud cos I said 'right I'm off outside to catch some toads then' and my son was ok about it... so I have definitely brought him up to try any food!

[Milims]

guess I might qualify as crazy parent as i told my son that toad in the hole was made with toads

actually I'm kind of proud cos I said 'right I'm off outside to catch some toads then' and my son was ok about it... so I have definitely brought him up to try any food!

Reminds me of the first time my sis had a french girl staying with us on an exchange. My mum made toad in the hole and translated the name into french. The girl went pale and declared disgustedly "Oh! I not sink I like zees toad in zee 'ole!" to which my sis replied "well you eat frogs legs don't you?!"

[kit-e-kate]

When i asked where i had come from (as we all do at a certain age) my parents told me that my dad had made me out of welding rods in the shed at the end of the road.

And once i came home from school to find they had moved the fireplace. When i asked my dad about it he told me the fireplace had always been there, and totally denied moving it. Same thing happened when he moved the light fitting in the living room ceiling!

He also used to tell me that little girls grow up to be men and little boys grow up to be women, and that when he was little he'd had blonde ringlets and was called Ralph-ina.

Its a wonder i'm half as sane as i am!

[carolinej]

I was told that eating crusts would put hairs on my chest. I never ate them after that!!

Also that raw mushrooms would give me cancer....after I had eaten a raw mushroom!!!!

cj

[Shabba]

I love the one about unscrewing your belly button and your bum falling off. That's had me giggling for ages!

My Mum used to tell me that eating leeks would make me in to a brilliant ballerina!

Also that eating beef would give me big boobs when I grew up. I became vegetarian when I was 12 and those big boobs never materialized so I guess she was right!

[mrsflibble]

my dad told me that the milk that comes in those little pots at cafés and such is chicken milk. I've since adapted this comment and been telling stupid, gullible friends that it's cat milk.

I can name 3 that believed me straight off.


damn I wish i had heard the tummy button one! I explained to sophie what its real use was/is. she calls it her belly circle. she's incredibly inquisitive at the mo and I have a heavily pregnant friend so we've been learning about babies in tummies in a very innocent, three year old comprehension way. it's lovely. she knows what her belly "circle" did.

[Thomzo]

My mother told me it was bad manners to eat the red or orange sweets and if you were offered sweets by someone else you should always take the green or yellow ones. I was about 35 when I realised she was having me on.

She also used to keep rags in a box under the kitchen sink, along with the shoe polish. I was scared to get a new rag out in case there were spiders in there so she told me that there couldn't possibly be any spiders in the box as they hated the smell of shoe polish.

Also heard the ones about apple pips, carrots, crusts, chewing gum, nose picking, apple trees in ears, and the wind changing faces. On that one, though, my aunt always told me not to frown as you will get wrinkles. You can't really argue with that.

Mind you, I'm just as bad. I once had some friends staying with a young son. We had a big black cat at the time and I told the child that it was a panther. I did feel rather guilty when he had nightmares about panthers that night.

Cheers
Zoe

[MuddyWitch]

My friend's son, then 8, asked how a baby got into my tummy, as I was pregnant at the time. (I'd gone home btw...don't blame me this time ) She decided the time must be right to tell him, beleiving if they ask the questions they're ready for the answers. She spent about twenty minutes carefully explaining whilst he listened goggle eyed. When she'd finished, he thought for a moment & then said:

"Ok, now tell me how it REALLY happens!!!"

MW

[Annpan]

My Mum told me sanitary pads were nappies for ladies and all ladies had to wear them - I thought all women were incontinent until I was about 11.

One Christmas (I was around 12), while watching a documentary covering the birth of Christ, they mentioned the alter-like stone where he was circumcised, I asked my Mum what that was and she said 'I told you yesterday, and I am not going to tell you again' - nice way to get out of awkward situations, but I was a fragile and harassed child who was always being called 'stupid' - for a long time I believed she had told me, and I was to stupid to remember ..... (I now know I am not stupid....daft maybe, but not stupid )

[Mr and Mrs luvpie]

I envy you all the only thing I remember being told when I was younger was beign taught to play crib by my gran (who was going senile at the time) who taught me how to lose everytime. Now I have two children old enough to learn how to play, any interested enough to do so, and I can' teach them!!!!!!

Sarah (mrs luvpie

[eccentric_emma]

My mother told me it was bad manners to eat the red or orange sweets and if you were offered sweets by someone else you should always take the green or yellow ones. I was about 35 when I realised she was having me on.

i told my husband about this and he said that he could just imagine your reaction when you offered someone sweets and they took the red or orange ones! hilarious though

i used to get told by my dad that i would get to shave when i was a daddy (except that would never happen as i am female)...........my childminder had to have a very interesting conversation with my parents as i proudly declared this one day. and they had to break it to me that i would never be a daddy! i was very upset.

[Millymollymandy]

My mother told me it was bad manners to eat the red or orange sweets and if you were offered sweets by someone else you should always take the green or yellow ones. I was about 35 when I realised she was having me on.

I think there's a grain of truth there about the red ones (not the orange), because there are always way fewer red ones and they are by far the nicest!

[sleepyowl]

My dad always referred to sterilised milk as bull's milk

[Shabba]

My Mum told me sanitary pads were nappies for ladies and all ladies had to wear them - I thought all women were incontinent until I was about 11.

This reminds me of something my Mum used to tell me. When I asked what tampons were for she told me they were what ladies wiped their bottoms with! I could never quite understand this as I was always fishing the applicators out of the bathroom bin and using them as telescopes for my teddy bears! Never understood how a cardboard tube would be necessary for wiping your bottom so I didn't believe her, but if I'd really known where they'd been I might have taken more notice of my Mum's orders to leave them in the bin where she'd put them!

[contadina]

I was always fishing the applicators out of the bathroom bin and using them as telescopes for my teddy bears

Now there's an image to conjure up. One of my older sisters explained that ladies wrapped towels around themselves when they had a period. For years I thought I'd have to wrap myself in a bath towel every month when I got older. Try as I might though, I couldn't quite work out why and thought it must be to keep you warm.