The vistors from hell

[Graye]

I'm laughing as I type this (slightly hysterically I think) but I certainly wasn't at 10 this morning!

A dear friend who lives in southern Spain and who puts us up when we are down there (and vice versa when they come up here) asked if we would mind putting up her brother and wife as the were "more or less going past on their way to the ferry". I agreed. More fool me!

We knew they would arrive at about 10 last night so we got a supper ready, cheese and biscuits, cold pizza and some cold meats. We had coffee in the machine and a couple of bottles of half decent French red open near the fire and thought it would probably be a pleasant evening.

So they arrived more or less on time. Here are the first few comments -

I had a game finding you - the directions were wrong. (I checked the paper he was waving, they were right, he just can't his left from his right apparently.

We haven't eaten since breakfast. (And you turn up in a stranger's home at 10.30 at night and expect dinner? What's wrong with paying for a meal on the way?)

French cheese is so nasty. Doesn't it have botulism or something? (At this point OH drags me into the kitchen and suggests botulism wouldn't be half serious enough for these two)

Isn't French wine bitter? I much prefer Spanish. (Actually I tend to agree but this was €5 a bottle and perfectly acceptable)

Oh no, I can't drink coffee at night, I'll never sleep. Do you have English tea? (Yes but you aren't having any of my precious Yorkshire teabags, you can have a nasty French Twinings one...)

Then she said "I think I'll have a bath", asked to borrow my hairdryer and disappeared to bed. This was probably the best move she could have made actually as she was in serious danger of a black eye by now.

This morning she commented because we had margarine rather than butter, we didn't have croissants (the nearest boulangerie is 11km away and we NEVER bother to go for ourselves) had UHT milk rather than fresh and gave them instant rather than filter coffee.

They left with hardly any thanks and I must confess I expected to find a tip on the bedside table after they had left (although the service wasn't apparently up to much so perhaps not).

I was so furious that I must admit I phoned the friend in Spain this lunchtime to tell her what I thought. "Oh no!" she exclaimed, "they were far worse down here." They apparently got into a row with their lovely local bar owner about beer prices (he has a standard price displayed but charges his "locals" less, apparently taking the potential loss on himself) the next door neighbour about his barking dog and complained to our friends that their house was "poky". They never once paid for a meal or bought any food either.

We did end up laughing about it but I do wish she hadn't inflicted them on me too. I suppose the only good thing is that they won't be visiting either of us again!

[Mr and Mrs luvpie]

And I thought it was a strong gust of wind that I heard this morning, now I realise that it was just your sigh of relief as you closed the dor behind them

we had visitors not half as bad as that whilst they were here I had to pick the kids up from school, I seriously considered just never returning to my home!!!

Sarahx

[MKG]

Well bloody hell! That's where they went.

Mike

[Thomzo]

Aren't some people ungrateful! Did you get their address, perhaps you can inflict yourself (or one of us) on them at some point in the future

Well done for not thumping them though. It might just have hurt you more than them.

Zoe

[shamie]

well done on the patience front, i would have smoke coming out my ears if that happened in my own home!!!!!!!!!

[Martina]

Ingrates. I don't know where you found the patience, Graye. I would have made it clear that I was unhappy with their behaviour and reminded them that when you visit, at least a modicum of gratitude is customary.

Jeesh, some people!

Martina

[MuddyWitch]

Methinks I would have ordered them out-I wouldn't have been nearly as patient as you.

for Graye

MW

[growingthings]

now I know what a 18mth old and a 4 year old come in handy. Some of the greatest deterants I know!!

Well done you for keeping it together. I like to think that I would be gracious in a situation like that but I think I know myself well enough not to expect miracles


to you Graye

[Millymollymandy]

Thankfully it was only a brief stay but it's a bit mean of your friend who knows what they are like to have sent them on to you! Well done for keeping your cool!

[Green Aura]

You just can't credit how rude some people can be, can you?

Last year, we had similar, although thankfully not quite so bad, visitors. They arrived, a family of 3, with 2 bottles of wine as their contribution to the week - which they drank themselves on the first night and moved on to our stash. Their son complained that he couldn't survive on muesli for breakfast (he'd been offered toast as well) - I think they were expecting full English every morning. They went out by themselves, thankfully, but made sure to return in time for lunch and dineer every day.

The day they left, they bought some soap, which they got family discount on. They then left it all in the chocolate shop and phoned me to post it to them - which I did, at my own expense!

You're right Graye - you have to laugh

[Martina]

You just can't credit how rude some people can be, can you?

Last year, we had similar, although thankfully not quite so bad, visitors. They arrived, a family of 3, with 2 bottles of wine as their contribution to the week - which they drank themselves on the first night and moved on to our stash. Their son complained that he couldn't survive on muesli for breakfast (he'd been offered toast as well) - I think they were expecting full English every morning. They went out by themselves, thankfully, but made sure to return in time for lunch and dineer every day.

The day they left, they bought some soap, which they got family discount on. They then left it all in the chocolate shop and phoned me to post it to them - which I did, at my own expense!

You're right Graye - you have to laugh

UN.BE.LIEVE.ABLE

[Green Aura]

I should add that I'm really fond of this person, so undoubtedly would do it all again, does that make me the daft one?

[homegrown]

No it does not GA just a nice person, but next time stash the good wine, chocolate and food somewhere safe and serve them baked beans and fatty sausages

[Milims]

Well done both of you! It makes me glad that we rarely have visitors - and then really only those who can put up with us!